These Are The 10 Most Mind Altering Sex- & Relationship Practices I Have Ever Seen
About Me
I am a Conscious Sex and Relationships Writer and Editor-in-Chief at My Tiny Secrets. Life is my research lab and playground where I get all my inspiration. I am currently writing my first novel documenting my own personal journey of (mis)adventures in love, sex and relationship.Warning: Some of these sex and relationship practices you might be better off not trying!
I have often felt the heavy pressure of having to submit to social norms about the way I should look and act. There are so many restricting labels on what it is to be a woman or a man, and of course how our sex life and relationship with our significant other should be like.
Do I have to dress like this to attract a man? How important should sex be in a relationship? Is it ok for me to be the breadwinner or is it more ‘normal’ for me to be the one who looks after the children? I have so often been confused by the roles that society has tried to box me into to…and just wanted to rebel and do the opposite!
When I look at how our animal friends do things differently, it seems there are many more ways of living available to us also.
Warning: Some of these sex and relationship practices you might be better off not trying! Here you go:
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#1 If You Were A Praying Mantis’ You Would Eat Your Lover After Sex
Photography by: Unknown
This one might make you a bit squeamish. If you’re a male praying mantis you’d better watch out because after sex your female companion will be looking at you with hungry eyes.
Not because she’s in love with you but because she plans to enjoy you for dinner.
Yes, that’s right!
The female praying mantis often eats her lover after the act.
How’s that for an alternative to the post-sex cuddle! It’s called sexual cannibalism and some females will even bite the male’s head off during the middle of intercourse.
Apparently this aids with the fertilization process because the beheaded male becomes a more vigorous lover! What the f***?
#2 If You Were A Dolphin You Would Love Sex With Men And Women Equally
Photography by: Unknown
Dolphins like having sex and lots of it!
When they mate the actual sexual act is quite short but (to make up for it perhaps!) the foreplay is long and drawn out.
They will also quite happily engage in non-reproductive sexual behaviour, with masturbation and homosexual behaviour being very common.
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Would you believe they even give hand-jobs to other dolphins, stimulating the genital area with their fins? If this isn’t proof that sex is driven by more than biological needs, I don’t know what is!
It has also been known for dolphins on occasion to display sexual behaviour toward other species, including humans! You have been warned!
#3 If You Were A Bonobo Monkey It Would Be Natural To Be Polyamorous
Photography by: Unknown
Along with chimpanzees the bonobo monkeys are the closest living relatives to humans.
We might have invented computers and rockets to take us into outer space but the bonobo monkeys discovered an answer to the age-old dilemma of competition for sex.
They have a practical and rather simple solution… have sex with anyone that is up for it! Male or female!
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Instead of wasting energy fighting over the attention of one woman, two rival males will quite happily have sex with each other.
Don’t worry. The females are not left out. Why not have a gentle rub of clitorises between close friends? If it feels good…
#4 If You Were A Cuttlefish You Might Cross-Dress To Cock-Block Other Men
Photography by: Miroha
Unlike their human counterparts, male cuttlefish don’t mind being mistaken for a woman. In fact, they actually prefer it!
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Male cuttlefish use camouflage when seducing a female in order to fool passing male rivals. Their love interest will see their male strips but they might adopt the mottled appearance of a female on the other side of their body to hide from males.
Cross-dressing to look like a female buys them some valuable time alone with their target, helping them to charm a mate before other males notice the competition. What a sneaky pick-up strategy! Is this the cuttlefish version of a cock-block?
#5 If You Were a Peacock The Men Would Dress Up to Impress The Women
Photography by: Unknown
Perhaps men should dress to impress in makeup and uncomfortable shoes? If they were peacocks, they would!
In the peacock kingdom the males are the ones that have to prove their worth in the beauty department.
They must show off their exotic coloured feathers in a graceful mating dance while the female peacocks get to ogle the eye candy. This is one gender role reversal I can wholeheartedly get behind! I am more than okay with the idea of letting the men do all the peacocking (sorry about the pun!) to get our attention. Bring it on!
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#6 If You Were An Emperor Penguin You Would Share Breadwinner and Childrearing Roles
Photography spotted HERE
Emperor penguins split the domestic child rearing and breadwinner duties equally between the sexes.
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They take turns looking after the young while the other goes fishing to find food for the family.
But before we fall too much in love with the emperor penguin way of life, we need to dispel a common myth about their mating behaviour. Forget the romantic notions you may have about emperor penguins being faithful lovers. The truth is they are only monogamous for one breeding cycle! Go fish!
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#7 If You Were A Seahorse The Men Would Give Birth To Babies
Photography By: Kelly McCarthy
Want to pass the childbirth labour over to your man? If you were a seahorse you could!
The male seahorse carries the babies to term in his pouch, freeing up the female’s energy to produce more eggs.
The male seahorse won’t get much of a break after giving birth though. After popping out between 100 and 2500 babies he will be expected to get mating again within a couple of days.
I know I’d prefer to leave that many labour contractions to someone else! Don’t worry, I’ll be there to hold his hand and take photos!
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#8 If You Were An Ant You Would Live In A Matriarchal Society
Photography Spotted HERE
Forget patriarchy. That is so human!
The ant colony is ruled by a female Queen or Queens who have sex with multiple males all in the name of ensuring the best survival of the hive. Of course that’s what it is!
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Don’t get too excited ladies. All the workers who build and maintain the hive, defend the nest and forage for food are actually female ants. Their male counterparts only mate and eat! Go figure!
#9 If You Were A Spotted Hyena The Women Would Be The Dominant Sex
Photography by: Unknown
The females rule the roost in the hyena kingdom. They are physically larger and more aggressive, and are known to resort to violent behaviour to keep their males in line!
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To add insult to injury the female hyenas have penises.
Yes, you heard me right! These pseudo-penises are actually bigger and longer than the male versions (ouch to the ego!) and if you can believe it they use them for urination, copulation and even childbirth!
The female penises also come in handy to protect them from unwanted sex, allowing them to pick and choose the most desirable mating partners. Thank you natural selection!
#10 If You Were A Tamarin Monkey You Would Probably Live In A Threesome
Photography by: Wolfgang Wander
The Tamarin monkeys don’t stick to the nuclear family.
They are known to have all kinds of family combinations but by far the most common is one female to two males.
Go girls! Tamarins usually give birth to twins and because the males take on the main childrearing role, this means each male only has to carry one baby on their back. It makes practical sense this way, which is why us women would be all for it, right? I can’t think of any other benefits.
To more moments of real, authentic human being-ness!
Big, big love, Diane x
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Still thinking about the Tamarin Monkey? You have to watch this 🙂
Threesome Sex!? My Tips To Make It Happen ♥
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